A guy is put before the judge's bench because he is on trial for paying a prostitute for sex. "How do you plead?" asks the judge, to the defendant.
"Not Guilty, your honor."
Showing him a videotape of the alleged act, the prosecutor responds, "How can you possibly convince the court of your innocence, if we have both the sex act, plus your subsequent payment to the alleged prostitute right here on tape?"
"Easy," says the defendant, "I'll admit to the court that although I wasn't engaged in an act of prostitution, I was committing another 'heinous' crime ... Gambling."
"Gambling?" responds the prosecutor. "How so?"
"Well you see," answers the defendant, "I went up to the young lady earlier that night as she was working in a topless bar and said to her, 'I'll bet you $200 that you don't get to have sex with me tonight.' That videotape is just footage of me losing the bet!"
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
Miniscule Erection
A young man told his doctor that he was very embarrassed about the size of this penis and that potential sexual partners laughed at him.
On examination, the Willie certainly was weenie. The doctor established that the man had no trouble appealing to women, talking with them, inviting them back to his apartment, or he to theirs.
He suggested that perhaps he should try undressing with the lights out and slowly introducing his potential partner's hand to the smallish member so as not to shock.
The bloke thought it was worth a try as mates kept telling him size didn't matter and he was loathe to undergo penile enlargement surgery.
That weekend an attractive young lady accepted his invitation back to his apartment… the lights very dimmed very low during passionate moments of undressing, the girls hand was guided towards the miniscule erection.
In the dark she whispered, "No thanks, I don't smoke!"
On examination, the Willie certainly was weenie. The doctor established that the man had no trouble appealing to women, talking with them, inviting them back to his apartment, or he to theirs.
He suggested that perhaps he should try undressing with the lights out and slowly introducing his potential partner's hand to the smallish member so as not to shock.
The bloke thought it was worth a try as mates kept telling him size didn't matter and he was loathe to undergo penile enlargement surgery.
That weekend an attractive young lady accepted his invitation back to his apartment… the lights very dimmed very low during passionate moments of undressing, the girls hand was guided towards the miniscule erection.
In the dark she whispered, "No thanks, I don't smoke!"
Dirty Workout
Dirty Workout Prank
People of a workout group in a gym
get a hot and dirty lesson for home.
People of a workout group in a gym
get a hot and dirty lesson for home.
Monday, March 29, 2010
Zipper Fire
Guy sitting on a bench ,there is a fire on his zip
all the crowd passing by come to help him
all the crowd passing by come to help him
Sunday, March 28, 2010
Little Johny & Perhaps
The teacher says, 'Okay, class, we're going to play a game today. I want everyone to give me a sentence with the word 'perhaps' in it.'
Claude says, 'Perhaps if we are good, the teacher won't give us any homework.'
The teacher says, 'Very good, Claude.'
Mary says, 'The sky is very dark... Perhaps it's going to rain.' The teacher says, 'Very good, Mary.'
She calls on Little Johnny in the back.
Johnny says, 'Yesterday, when I got home from school, my sister and her music teacher both had their pants down to their ankles. Perhaps they were gonna pee on the piano.'
*-*-*-*-*-*- *-*-*-*-* -*-*-*-*- *-*-*-*-* -*-*-*-*-
Claude says, 'Perhaps if we are good, the teacher won't give us any homework.'
The teacher says, 'Very good, Claude.'
Mary says, 'The sky is very dark... Perhaps it's going to rain.' The teacher says, 'Very good, Mary.'
She calls on Little Johnny in the back.
Johnny says, 'Yesterday, when I got home from school, my sister and her music teacher both had their pants down to their ankles. Perhaps they were gonna pee on the piano.'
*-*-*-*-*-*- *-*-*-*-* -*-*-*-*- *-*-*-*-* -*-*-*-*-
Saturday, March 27, 2010
Friday, March 26, 2010
Naughty SMS
• This week is Breast Awareness Week. Spread the slogan: We stare because we care!
• Teacher: Soch or Veham me kya fark hai..? Pappu: Aap ki Beti Sweet & Sexy hai… Ye hamari Soch hai or wo hamare hathon se Bach jayegi ye Aap ka Veham hai.
• LESBIAN kisko kehte hain? - 2 kamini ladkiyan, Jo mard ko khush nahi dekh sakti!
• 70 ways to make a woman happy: No. 1 is shopping & the rest is '69'.
• Marwari 2 prostitute: I'll pay double if u let me do it in Marwari style. She agrees. After sex, she asks: What's Marwari style? , Marwari payment after 90 days!
• You wanna come to my place for some pizza and sex? No? Why, don't you like pizza?!
• Define Rape with the help of one good example? - Rape is a very-very difficult Job, For e.g.. It is like playing GOLF with a continuously moving HOLE!
• Response during sex:
Mistress: Wow ! Darling this is great.
Whore: Come on finish it now.
Girlfriend: Ah! Please slowly.
Wife: Ceiling needs painting !
• Height of being Realistic: An actress being fucked by a producer without using a condom saying that she has 2 play the role of a Pregnant lady in his next film!
• Knowledge is like ur underwear... U should have it, but not show it off & most important, while having sex, keep ur knowledge aside!
• Teacher: Soch or Veham me kya fark hai..? Pappu: Aap ki Beti Sweet & Sexy hai… Ye hamari Soch hai or wo hamare hathon se Bach jayegi ye Aap ka Veham hai.
• LESBIAN kisko kehte hain? - 2 kamini ladkiyan, Jo mard ko khush nahi dekh sakti!
• 70 ways to make a woman happy: No. 1 is shopping & the rest is '69'.
• Marwari 2 prostitute: I'll pay double if u let me do it in Marwari style. She agrees. After sex, she asks: What's Marwari style? , Marwari payment after 90 days!
• You wanna come to my place for some pizza and sex? No? Why, don't you like pizza?!
• Define Rape with the help of one good example? - Rape is a very-very difficult Job, For e.g.. It is like playing GOLF with a continuously moving HOLE!
• Response during sex:
Mistress: Wow ! Darling this is great.
Whore: Come on finish it now.
Girlfriend: Ah! Please slowly.
Wife: Ceiling needs painting !
• Height of being Realistic: An actress being fucked by a producer without using a condom saying that she has 2 play the role of a Pregnant lady in his next film!
• Knowledge is like ur underwear... U should have it, but not show it off & most important, while having sex, keep ur knowledge aside!
Thursday, March 25, 2010
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
Eva Longoria
Eva Longoria Picture Gallery
Longoria showing off some great cleavage.
I believe this shot sparked some pregnancy rumors at the time.
See This Hot Babe Pics
Longoria showing off some great cleavage.
I believe this shot sparked some pregnancy rumors at the time.
See This Hot Babe Pics
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
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